[Music: Fire - Kirby Air Ride]
- Crazy Woman: RAISINS!!!
- Mario: [screams and runs away] LUIGI! I NEED YOUR HELP! THE OLD LADY IS CRAZY AND SHE WANTS RAISINS!
- Luigi: Oh no!
- Crazy Woman: MARIO! IF YOU DON'T BUY ME SOME RAISINS, I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY KNIFE AND PULL OUT YOUR TEETH!
- Luigi: [begins to scream] OH JESUS CHRIST!
- SMG4: [screams and runs away]
- Crazy Woman: If you don't buy me some raisins, I'M GOING TO RAPE YOU!
- SMG4: Fine, fine. Let's go shopping.
[Music: Don't Look Down - Mario Party 7]
- Crazy Woman: Where are the raisins for the old man?
- Mario: I don't know!
- SMG4: Mario, you are following the crazy lady over and over again!
- Mario: MAMA F*CKER!
- Shop Owner: The raisins? That costs 13.99!
- Mario: Ah, piss.
[Mario and SMG4 are out of the store]
- Mario: Stupid old lady whining for some raisins.
- SMG4: Shut up about the lady.
- SMG3: Well, well, well. It wasn't three plumbers and an old lady. Look what the old man dragged back! [smacks Earl, an old man]
- Earl: YOU DUMB KIDS GET OFF MY PROPERTY!
- Crazy Woman: Old man?
- Earl: Oh, hi.
- Crazy Woman: What's your name?
- Earl: My name's Earl.
- Steve: GRANDPA! [hugs Earl]
- Earl: Grandson!
- Steve: [in his underwear] STEEEEEEEEEVE!!!!!
- Toad: Grandpa?
- SMG3: Oh what the fuck. [shrugs]
- SMG4: [sighs]
[Meanwihle at the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario was eating spaghetti, watching TV]
- Narrator: One day in Teletubby Land, Po meets up with an old stranger who was about between 96 or 97.
[slaps an old stranger and he runs away laughing]
- Old Man: YOU DUMB KIDS GET OFF MY PROPERTY!
- Po: NO! [starts running away from the Old Man]
- Old Man: Come back you dumb fucker!
- Po: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
- Laa Laa: [grabs a knife] SHUT UP BEFORE I'LL STAB YOU!
- Old Man: NO!
[Mario was still eating his spaghetti, laughing]
- Mario: This is so funny!
- Earl: MARIO!
[Mario screams in Homer's voice]
- Earl: HOLY SHIT, MARIO! Are you okay?
- Mario: You scared me! I thought your girlfriend was on your period.
- Earl: My grandson, Steve was in his underwear watching TV.
[scene cuts to Steve in his underwear having a sleepover with Shy Guy and Po as Steve dances]
- Shy Guy: [sees toast popping out of the toaster] TOAST! YEAAAAAAAH TOAST! [wrecks havoc in the sleepover]
- Po: OH SHIT!
- Steve: RUN BITCH RUN!!!!!
- Earl: Shy Guy wrecked havoc in the sleepover...
- SMG4: HOLY FUCK!
- SMG3: Ha! GAAAAAAAAY!
- Luigi: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
- Mario: I will have 13 dollars for some raisins.
[scene cuts to a graveyard where Mario has to get some raisins]
- Mario: Where are the raisins?
- Miyamoto's Ghost: BOO!
- Mario: [screams] Who are you?
- Miyamoto's Ghost: I'm a ghost!
- Mario: Can I have 13 dollars for raisins?
- Miyamoto's Ghost: Sure!
[Mario gives 13 dollars for raisins as the Ghost gives Mario raisins]
- Mario: I GOT RAISINS!
[scene cuts to the Mushroom Kingdom where Luigi is baking cookies]
- Luigi: I got cookies!
[the Bullies come out of the Mushroom Kingdom wrecking havoc and causing a mischief. Luigi dropped the cookies and was attacked by the Bullies]
- Steve: STEVE! To the rescue! [whistling sound]
[The Bullies stopped wrecking havoc]
- Steve: Wanna cookie? [grabs a giant cookie] COME AND F***ING GET IT!
[the bullies run to the giant cookie as the giant cookie rolls down to the Mushroom Kingdom. The bullies chase the cookie and the giant cookie fell into the water. The bullies fell into the water too]
- Earl: Nice job, dickface.
[scene cuts to the Crazy Woman and Mario hanging out]
- Mario: Hey, I heard that you found marijuana in my room, found toast all over the floor and I saw a giant cookie falling into the water.
- Crazy Woman: HEY! I LOVE WEED SO DANG MUCH! I'M FUCKING HIGH!
- SMG4: Oh shit! MARIO! How could you feed a woman from marijuana?
- Crazy Woman: RAAAAAAAAAAAAISIIIIIIIIIIIIINS!!!!
[scene cuts to SMG3 and Bowser insulting Earl]
- SMG3: YO EARL!
- Earl: WHAAAAAAT?
- SMG3: Butt!
- Earl: NNNNUGGHHHH!!!
- Bowser: Hey, dickface! Butt!
- Earl: I HAD IT ALREADY!! THAT'S IT! I'M LEAVING!